The Hypocrisy of Friendship
( I removed this article a while ago (sept) I didn't want the person below to accidently fidn it but I realise now that I want to write about how I feel and in doing that I need to write everything - so here we go)
I am so angry! Why do I let myself get into these situations? I trust people and I do things for them and I end up being taken for a ride. The sad thing is this isn't the first time, nor I'm sure will it be the last. I love all my friends, I value them as individuals and as parts of my extended 'family'. Yet lately I have been stretched to the limit with one such person, and I really don't know what I should do.
Let me give you a rundown... Firstly I should mention that I am a neat freak, for this I partially blame my mother, but I am none the less. I like my house to be neat and everything in it's place. I don't think I'm too bad, believe me I've seen worse. Anyway my partner and I agreed to let a friend (of mine) stay with us for a while, which we thought would be a few days, she's now been with us for nearly 2 months! ( Don't worry, we've got them paying rent for the pleasure). Now during this time, we have thought things to go pretty smoothly, I mean I do all the cleaning, cooking, washing etc so basically she's got a pretty good thing going. We had to lay down some rules after about 4 days though as our she came home drunk and proceeded to spend the remainder of the night throwing up and feeling basically sorry for herself. I spoke to her the next day and was given a large attitude but retaliated with, this is our house and we don't want that behaviour...(Thursday night by the way and both my partner and I had to work the next day).
Anyway since then we thought everything has been fine. My partner and I don't go out too often as we spend a lot of time saving for short trips to Europe and would much rather spend our money there than down at the local pub. Now I admit the last time she saw us we were more social and outgoing, but since then we have settled down as a couple more and moved to the other side of the planet, so things are bound to have changed. It is surely naive to think they wouldn't. However that said I have the distict impression that she thinks us to be boring, well my answer to that is if you don't like staying with us then leave!
Sorry I'm getting sidetracked, again we thought everything was fine until yesterday. I have heard through the grapevine that this 'friend' is unhappy with us. To her I am some sort of Nazi woman with how I run my household and she therefore says I am driving her crazy. (again I will say I am strict but in my defence I do all my own cleaning and cleaning up after people and don't ask for anything but a little appreciation in return). She also says she hates spending nights with us, as obviously we are old farts as we don't want to get wasted everynight. (been there done that, will now do it occassionaly for fun). What is really annoying me though is that she is all sugar and spice to my face and yet is obviously stabbing me in the back at every chance. I want her to leave yet I know that at the moment she has nowhere else to go and (though it's annoying me so much) I still have a heart and won't throw her on the street. However I can tell you the atmosphere in the house is not at all pleasant. What makes me privately laugh is the fact that she has been complaining to me over the last couple of weeks how other people seem to be wiping her off the contact list and how she seem to be always losing friends, (gee I wonder why??). Also that other people in our social circle have been giving us warnings about her, not to trust her, get money in advance, she is only interested in benefiting herself etc. Funny how what goes around comes around, really teaches me the value of friendship. If you have a problem with someone you should really talk it out with them and not with others as a) it makes you out as a gossiper and 
the other person ALWAYS finds out...somehow...